Friday, September 7, 2012

Being a Fugly Magnet is Lame


So I'm waiting for an appointment that's late, and I hop on POF to see if Good Looking Guy has e-mailed, but of course, he hasn't.

Neither has Neat Cool Nerd Guy who likes Bill Byson.  Bummer.

Instead, three fuglies wrote me. 

It's like I'm a magnet to them, and they are just drawn to me.  What is the deal? One of them had a frightening Frankenstein-shaped head.  The other had a head shaped like a light bulb.  It was rather alarming.

Why do I attract fuglies like a moth to a porch light? 

1. I am NOT fugly.  2. Don't fuglies know they're supposed to write other Fuglies like themselves?  Does a Cyclops try to mate with a swan?  Do frogs mate with eagles?  NO.

So what's the deal-io?

Besides the three fuglies, I have an Italian-Fuglie writing me, but I don't mind so much, because he at least had the balls to write, "If you're not attracted to me, I understand, but I'd still like to make friends." 

Bravo, Fuglie.  At least he knows he's one.  And not assuming that I think he's Brad Pitt.  For that, I just might agree to go out with him.

The other three Fuglies?  Buh-bye.


DSM said...

Hey, if looks are going to be your number one priority (which I know it isn't, but it's still pretty high on the list), you are going to keep getting jerks. Observation leads me to believe that the more aware a guy is of his own hotness, the bigger a jerk he is since he knows he can get away with it. Any good looking guys with great personalities won't be on a online dating site, they will already have been tackled in the street by a mob of rabid models.

So, in other words, try squinting.

And did you mean like the black and white original, or more like a Herman Munster thing going on there.

nate said...

Well, and therein lies the problem.

100+ years ago, looks didn't matter to most women. I'm reading a frontier woman's diary right now that discusses sex. Women were instructed to just lie there and try not to think about how much they were NOT INTO their husbands sexuality. Many women, as a consequence of NOT being attracted to their husbands, hated sex. You married for practical reasons.

But times have changed. There has to be some sort of attraction, and that DOES mean physicality.

How does it work if the guy is butt-ugly? It doesn't,especially if it's a mismatch, and the woman is pretty. Like usually attracts like.

Does that mean we should only go for the Brad Pitts? Well, yeah, they're taken and there's not enough to go around.

But chemistry, looks. They factor in. I just want a man who's not dog-ugly, just like most men want a women who's not either.

I just want a nice balance, looks, personality, integrity and chemistry. He doesn't have to light me on fire. But I can't be gagging either.