Monday, February 16, 2015

Phone Psycho Guy

Well, it certainly has NOT been a ghost town this year regarding my dating life.

Anything but.

Let me tell you about Phone Psycho Guy.

Firstly, I should have learned my lesson last summer from Indifferent Guy, in that, if I'm not attracted to a guy, then I should NOT let him pursue me.

But I'm sometimes slow to learn.  And I have this stupid theory that an average-looking guy is going to be nicer than a cute guy.  Not true.

Anyway, I let this average-guy, Monty, start texting me, with the stupidly hopeful notion, that he might somehow over time, get cuter and fun.

Didn't happen.

In fact, he texted me too much, to the point where I started blowing him off.

Until, I got this snarky text, "What are you doing this weekend?  I suppose you're busy."

Which I was.  And I didn't like that tone, so I replied something to the effect that I was indeed "busy."

He in turn said that I must be a "homo-guy"or a ""sick chick with issues"" because I always take too long to text him back, and probably didn't even want to meet him.

Uh, yeah, duh.  And are you effing kidding me--you're calling me a dude?  I texted him that I wished people wouldn't hide behind electronics.which led to him calling me on my cell.

And proceeding to YELL at me.  Why?  He was yelling/demanding why am I even on a dating-website if I never want to meet anyone or be bothered to text back promptly.  Hey, great way to impress!

Hello?  Yelling at me.  I let him yell about 10 seconds more while I sat there in shock.  Then I promptly said, "Monty, I'm afraid you're too combative for my taste--take care (which always means fuck you)," then I hung up on him.

Amazing.  I wonder if him and Felon Guy are roommates?  LOL.  Stay tuned.

Thursday, February 12, 2015

Bullshitter and Valentine's

Banana bread that I made yesterday and was going to give to my possible new, potential and lovely boyfriend.

Because I was THAT sure we were an item.

Let me explain.  Our first date was right out of a romance novel.  He was tall, cute, well-mannered and charming.  Smart, he invented one of the first radial "airplane" motorcycles.  Popular.  All over Google.  In fact, if you're nosy, you can easily find him on Google.

Anyway, our first date lasted 8 hours, and it was wonderful.  He asked permission to hold my hand.  Texted each other all week long.  He called our first date "amazing," and asked me out last Saturday.

We went on a romantic walk around a lake, two vineyards and dinner.  It was one of the best dates of my life, and he thought the same.

Then, as we were preparing for Valentine's, I get this text:

"Natalie, I got to be honest.  I heard from an old girl friend that I haven't seen in 5 years.  And it's messing with my head today."  I replied that I would bow out if he wanted to see her, and I got this response:

"Don't want to date her but maybe think I shouldn't date at all for a bit if that makes sense?"

I sadly replied that I understood.

Then late last night I get this confusing text obviously meant for someone else:

"I do :)"

I texted him this morning, that his text was obviously meant for someone else.  And I've heard nothing in response.  NOTHING.   Crickets.

Nice.  Why.  Do.  I. Try.  This guy seemed really nice, honest, into me, and genuine.  I wish I could turn this post into something humorous, but I just can't right now.

I haven't even told you about the Phone Psycho Guy or the dude I'm meeting tomorrow for happy hour.  That should at least be funny.

Staying positive.  I simply must, and thank you, Universe, for spinning this sad one right out of my life before I got hurt.

Stay tuned.