Thursday, August 9, 2012

Hole's Five Red Flags


Yours truly.

I had a horrible time sleeping last night when I got home from rally.  Get this, I ran into Gary/The Hole after I left the San Diego crowd and was going home.

There's over 30,000 people on Main St. during the Sturgis Rally, and he had to be standing right in front of me like a scene outta Casablanca. 

It's Thursday, and I've talked to Crackie, Bassy, Dooder, Nicky, Jen and Katie.  We even quizzed J.R.C.   Three dudes and four chicks,  to try and figure out why Hole did what he did.  I even sent him an email to try to really wrap my head around it.  No reply of course, because The Hole doesn't take responsibility for his actions.  Why should he?

Flag One


So that begs the question, what the hell happened?

I think I listed all his good wonderful traits in another blog.  So here goes.


ME: Well, there was one thing that was weird, I saw a bullet hole in his bed.
NICKY/JJ: First of all, he promised you a bed downstairs SO WHY were you staring at his bed.  Are you FUCKING kidding me?  Why was there a bullet hole in his bed?
ME: I don't know.  He wouldn't tell me.  He said he'd tell me later.

Flag Two.  Which is worse, that he has a bullet hole through his bed that he admitted to or telling me, "I'll tell you later."  "Later" is to buy time. 
Always a bad flag.


Hole: I have an obsession with the Hells Angels.  (An obsesion with TV shows, books, working out, history=healthy.  An obsession with the mafia or organized crime=sick)
Me: (WTF?)  Uh, OK.

This is the part where experience will piss you off.  I know all about the FOUR outlaw gangs.  Oh, wait, "MC's."  I dated a top 13'er in the "Infamous Four."  And that is all I'm going to say. 

TONS OF UNANSWERED QUESTIONS ABOUT THIS.  For my own safety, I played stupid.
Flag Three

Me: So whatever happened to your wife and you?
Hole: I will tell you about that later.

Only "later" turned into a hellhole tirade the day he dumped me where NOTHING was his fault and she was a **%& bitch.  Everything was "her fault."  I think as long as he lives he WILL NEVER  be over her.  Thanks, Hole, for trying to date me when you will never be emotionally available.
Flag Four

Crackie: So does he drink?
Me: No.  He said he quit many years ago, had to.
Crackie: Does he still follow the 12 step program and meet with his sponsor and pay it forward and help others?
Me: NO.
Crackie: He's a fucking "dry drunk," D-bag.  Be glad he's gone.

Flag Five

At this point, I am glad I saw the red flags, but I wish I would have ran faster.  Either way, seeing them, and noting them, made the hurt a little less.

He's got access to this page, but like Crackie and Bass said, two males I might add.  "He'll NEVER WORK ON HIS ISSUES."  He'll just keep looking for Miss Right and never look deeper at himself.  I thought that really insightful coming from two manly dudes.

Time to move on. Sorry this blog wasn't funny like I promised, but I had started to fall for him, and life is full of grey issues.  I don't hate him.  He wasn't like the others.  However, the Universe wanted me to learn some lessons.


Creative Soul Designs said...

Yup, the drinking one is weird. I think it's ok if it's NOT b/c he was a former alchie. Some people just have a bad reaction to alcohol and don't enjoy drinking it (I personally can't imagine it, but there you go.) But seriously, some people have a body chemistry that does not agree w/ alcohol.

In THIS case, with the bullet holes, Hells Angels & other $hit, him DRINKING would probably have made the sitch far worse. Be glad he didn't, he might have driven off the road with you in the car, crazy as he sounds.

Creative Soul Designs said...

Did my comment go through?

nate said...

He had a whole dark side of him he kept hidden. According to How to Spot a Dangerous Man Before You Get Involved by Sandra Brown, his type was listed in there. He falls under both "The Addicted" (ex boozer) and "The Secret Life," (H.A.'s) both types of men you don't want to get to know. Sigh, I hope I don't meet another type out of that damned book!