Monday, August 20, 2012

Dolts, Nudies, and other D-bags in the Dating World

This was sent to me by a new internet dude from the web who's been writing and texting me.  Is he a potential D-bag like Hole and Cactus? 

What's up with men when they do this?  Why do they think I want to see their chest?  To show me that they have one?  Well, thanks, dude.  I was wondering if your moobs might be a deal-breaker.

Perhaps they think it's hot? 
"She's gonna pass out when she sees dis." (knuckles dragging as they lurch over to download their picture)

New rule: I am now offically going back to blogging about guys on here WHILE I am dating them.  Forget this being nice and waiting til they're officially a shithead.  I'm going to nickname this one, Ego.

I wrote back, "Uh.  Nice, Ego.  You're in shape, apparently."  WTF did he expect me to say, "Hi, let's bang!"

I've decided they get ONE "get outta jail card" and after that, out they go; he almost used that card on this one.  But last night, he sent me a picture of a view outside a condo window from some foreign place and wrote, "Coming soon."  Coming soon?  Is that like, "Coming soon to a theatre near you" ? I thought for sure it was intended for someone else, so I wrote back, "What was that?  Is this text intended for someone else?"

Turns out it was for just lucky me, and it's a time share he has in Cabos (he has many time shares as he's wealthy) and wanted to know if I'd be interested in going this winter.  Oh, OK.  But still!

"NO!," I wrote.  "I hardly know you yet."  He wrote, "Never mind."

What's with these men.  I mean, the next one, is getting a fucking frying pan over the head, or maybe even worse.  Gawd, for all of Crackie and Hole's faults, they never pulled this shit.

ONE more chance, then out comes the frying pan.

Fed up in South Dakota.


Creative Soul Designs said...

That photo makes me want to throw up in my mouth a little, lol. Reminds me of the one I got from a guy who in full camo (as if he were fighting in Iraq or something), was holding out his arms on either side with a dead turkey in each. His other photo was of him with his back toward the camera leaning against a door as if he were about to be frisked. Seriously, dudes. Instead of seeing nice pecs, I merely see "stupidity." Thanks for the share, Nat. Nearly made me wet myself from laughing (NOT from being turned on! ;))

nate said...

Ha, ha. Yeah, hunting pictures are a biggie, too. I don't get that. I don't post pictures of me gardening or knitting. What gives?