Wednesday, May 4, 2011

I Need a Bib!?

Doing laundry the other day, I noticed that every one of my sweatshirts had stains just under the collar and front. It seems I can no longer put anything in my mouth without dribbling down the front of my shirts, creating multi-colored artwork.

What's up with that?
Is is just getting older, or getting sloppier, or just impatient? Do I have a hole in my lip that I don't know about?

The usual suspects are typically coffee, as in, "Yipes, that's too hot," then showering a few drops down the front of my sweatshirt. Or, "I'll just taste this sauce ten more times," hovering over the stove and drizzling the front of my apron with droplets of spaghetti sauce.

White is out of the question. I cannot wear anything white, or the item is trashed. Yup, it's only black for me, folks.

Another thing I've noticed, what's up with the sneezing and accidentally whizzing a tiny bit if you sneeze too hard song-and-dance?

Is this just all pre-menapause fun? Perhaps I've been lax on my kegel exercises (which don't really seem important when you're not having sex anymore).

And the memory issues. I can't seem to remember anything.

What were we just talking about? Oh . . . growing old.

It ain't for sissies.

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